55: Mum
My mother died of cancer just before Christmas. Here a few thoughts about her passing.
My mother died of cancer just before Christmas. Here a few thoughts about her passing.
My amazing mother died peacefully at 6pm 20 December 2020.
I’m so grateful to have spent time looking after her before she had to go into hospital, and to have been able to visit her in her last days. I was there at the end. So much love.
As my mother is now on end of life care, I’m able to visit her at the hospital. It’s a hard, hard time. Thankfully my younger brother has been able to be here too, so we can take breaks and tag-team and my Mum has someone with her almost all the time.
Sorry about not posting or podcasting for a while. A family member has just been diagnosed with a serious illness, and helping them has taken up all of my time and energy. I hope to be able to resume posting soon.
Back at the lake, talking about greed, including spiritual greed.
The podcast I mention is by Brad Warner - Can you be just a little bit greedy?
The quotation I give as “Now you have, so guard well” is actually “Preserve well for you now have; this is all;” and is found in The Most Excellent Mirror—Samādhi, one of the scriptures recited in the morning at Sōtō Zen temples. (The wording I give may exist in a different scripture, but I haven’t been able to find it).
Misty by the lake today.
Back on the Ridge walk. Today I talk a little bit about a chapter from the Shobogenzo called Kobusshin - The original, unchanging Buddha-mind.
Wonderful walk today.
I’m still here. An experiment in recording at home. I’ll be getting back into themed podcasts soon. Stay well.
I made a mistake in the podcast: Rev. Master Mugō’s blog is at jademountains.net.
So many fungi on this walk.
Once again the necessity of letting go in meditation is clear.
Fresh
Thoughts on time, meditation and the self.
I would strongly suggest reading “Uji”, a chapter of Dogen’s Shobogenzo.
I would also suggest listening to Rev. Master Daishin Morgan’s talk: Time and existence are the same thing
A brief podcast from Trafalgar Square. I talk about how compassion is to be found everywhere and in all things.
How meditation lets us see how we set up our own contexts, and allows us to let them go.
How not doing is just fine.
How meditation allows us to let go of undigested assumptions and find peace of mind and deep meaning.
Sunday morning
Keeping effort at the right level.
I don’t mention it in the podcast, but the title is a reference to a piece of teaching the Buddha gave to a monk who used to be a musician before he was ordained. The monk was trying too hard in his practice, and eventually exhausted himself and became discouraged. The Buddha knew of his musical interest, and reminded him that tuning a string too tight or too slack will not produce the desired result. The monk understood, and was able to find right effort, and continued his training successfully.
More on balance and active training.
I finally get round to talking about Dharma, and how we can find the capacity to deal with things which we didn’t know we could work with.
Just a short one today, about pushing through resistance
How sitting still with acceptance is deeply healing.
I mention two Dharma talks which I listened to recently:
Rev. Master Jiyu: A True Master by Rev. Master Shiko Rom
Refining one’s purpose by Rev Master Daishin Morgan
Rev. Master Shiko Rom’s talk starts with a verse, which is traditionally recited before a lecture:
“The unsurpassed, penetrating and perfect Truth is seldom met with, even in a hundred thousand myriad kalpas. Now we can see and hear it, we can remember and accept it. I vow to make the Buddha’s Truth one with myself.”
Moving forward in difficulty, with a bright mind.
In the woods, unclear what to talk about, and a thank you.
Scattered thoughts on the boldness of the mind that seeks the Way.
Thoughts on facing our fears and moving forward. The temple I mention is Todaiji in Nara.
Finding peace wherever we are.
A talk about taking refuge in the Sangha. We need to connect.
How meditation allows us to let go of habits of mind and body.
Still going.
Some thoughts on a well known Zen saying - When the teacher points at the Moon, only a fool looks at the finger.
Some reflections on our senses as teachers.
Dusk by the lake, and reflections on perspectives.
How the last few days have felt like a meditation retreat, and how a retreat often feels.
Why training to attain ease is ultimately unsatisfactory.
I talk about one type of representation of the Boddhisatva of compassion, poised in thought.
A bit of teaching which was passed on to me in my very first introduction to formal meditation. Still true, still useful.
The importance of daily meditation.
Thoughts on teachers and students.
A simple bit of teaching which cuts through a lot of negativity.
Shelter
Fallen
A brief tribute to a friend who died a few days ago.
I mention Throssel - that’s Throssel Hole Buddhist Abbey.
Change and sacrifice.
I talk about an XTC track from their 1986 album, Skylarking.
Thoughts on emotions and being with others. There is a lot of wind noise on this recording. Sorry about that.
Grow
How not striving to become Buddha allows us to make progress in training.
Recorded in a churchyard at the end of today’s walk.
How different aspects of the self are different aspects of training.
On the path
I’m back by the lake this morning. Today I’m talking about not wasting energy by struggling with self imposed standards.
This talk is on a line from Dogen’s Rules for Meditation.
I’m home now, so I can add some links.
The other piece I quoted from is, in fact, called Genjo Koan - Realising the Fundamental Point.
This is about why I use the include.co.uk domain name for my website, and how including everything in our meditation allows us to deal with things which come up in meditation and in life.
A different walk today. I needed to exercise my legs so I drove to a nearby place where I could do a little gentle hill-walking. It’s mostly me puffing up-hill, but I do talk near the end.
Half asleep. Still going.
Thoughts on how it is to be in any particular place.
Why, done properly, it’s a good thing.
No. Not the lake.
Sounds heavy. Need not be.
This recording is with a different recording device, so it’s in stereo and has generally better sound. It does have some periods of wind noise. Sorry about that. I hope the content of the talk makes up for any annoyance.
Contact me on Twitter, @jwelby if you’d like to send any feedback.
Another podcast on the hoof. This time I talk about Indra’s Net, a reminder that all things are connected.
I’ve been feeling really tired for the past few days. I’ve kept walking, but I haven’t felt up to podcasting.
I think I need to stop and get a proper rest for a day or two. Hopefully I’l be back by the lake very soon.
Another recording from the lakeside. This one is about how unsui - the term used for a novice Zen monk in Japan - inspires me in times of difficulty.
Another podcast from next to the lake. Or it may have been in the lake. The boundary got kind fuzzy while I was recording this.
Another podcast recorded and posted on the hoof. This one is about Right Effort.
A shorter one today, recorded and published in light rain.
Another talk made and posted while walking. I mention a particular Buddhist scripture called Sandokai. You can find the text online. It’s not very long. The talk is 25mins long, so not really a microcast this time, more of a podcast. Once again, I hope it’s of use to someone.
I’m on a walk from my house, standing by a lake. I just made a quick one-take recording to try out microcasting on-the-hoof. I mention the Three Pure Buddhist Precepts. I think most people are already in sympathy with them, so the talk is not just for Buddhists. I hope it may be of use to someone out there.
Buddy - Now in Oz.
Walking is good. Seeing a bird with a beakful of nesting material is calming. Life is going on.
I wanted to recommend this Zen talk. I would say more, but it speaks for itself.
It was recommended by Rev. Mugo on the Jade Mountains blog.
After reading a post on the blog of the very excellent Austin Kleon, I sat down and started to make a new music track.
It started off as an exercise in using a slow tempo, and ended up as a the theme for a horror movie.